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SINGLE MOTHERS

November 1, 2000

We ask what is a single mother? Is she a woman with much strength and love or pain and fear? Maybe she's the devil in disguise or perhaps the angel beneath the pain.

Could she be a woman of much style and grace?

One thing is for certain; no one can understand what a single mother is unless they experience the feeling themselves. A single mother is a woman who is filled with everlasting, unconditional love, and words of wisdom to guide the way through life.

A single mother doesn't recieve much credit today for the way she dedicates her life to working long hard hours and making time in her busy schedule to take care of what is hers. She goes through life trying so hard to do her best for her child, yet sometimes she feels as if the world is caving in, although one thing goes up, another one comes down.

For instance; she might get a raise at work but then the bills pile up. She has no financial support. She struggles to put food on her table and a roof over family's head. The only thing that keeps her family alive and well is her and her love.

People with traditional standards always seem to say, " How dare she bear a child alone with no husband!" They don't understand the concept that life doesn't always turn out the way we planned. We don't always get what we want.

Very judgmental people snarl and stare as the single mother walks by with her beautiful little girl for whom she has sacrificed her life. If she needs a jacket or a pair of shoes, yet her child does too, her child comes first. She puts all of her wants and needs aside for the sake of her child.

I've had a single mother for twenty difficult years of my life. It wasn't easy for either of us. I had to grow up quicker than most kids so that I could help my mother. Thoughts of not having a father became an issue from time to time, but today I wouldn't change it for the world!

When I was a little girl and I fell and scraped my knee; good old mommy was there to doctor me up with her tender touch and loving care. She tucked me into bed at night and rubbed my belly when I was sick.

When adolescence was my stage in life, grammar school wasn't so easy for me because my classmates used to tease me and laugh at me because I didn't have what they had. It always seemed as if I was alone.

But when the time came to cry, my mom had a way of showing me how to take my hanging head and hold it up high and proud. As adulthood moved in and romance became a part of my life, mother was often needed.

I fell in love and he broke my heart. I ran to my mother and poured out all my pain. I couldn't seem to conquer the fear of moving on and tears fell like the rain pouring down on a dark, gloomy day, but mommy was always there.

She taught me how to disregard my fears, and she calmed my cries by showing me that life goes on. She told me "You have to accept what has gone wrong, forgive him and yourself and move on."

Some say a mother is one who bears children, one who cooks and cleans and that's all she is here for. For me, she's the soothing of the soul and the healing of the heart.

A mother: a kind-hearted woman with much strength, wisdom, and integrity.

--- Copyright © 1999 Amanda Martin

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