Early one morning this past week, Scooter and I went for our daily walk down by the town pool and lake. After Scooter fulfilled his daily "duty" we strolled in front of the pool so he could scoop out the scents of the bushes.

To my surprise, fenced inside the pool was a female mallard duck. It seems her landing was misjudged and she got herself into a pickle, and was now trapped inside the pool's fence, not able to figure out quite yet how to get out.

On the outside of the fence was her "mate." Totally frantic at the fact that he could not get to her. Around and around this poor male waddled around the fence. Making his mate so nervous. Distracting her from allowing her dignity in letting her solve her own problem. To figure out on her to get out of this predicament.

Now my first instinct, being codependent, was to try to figure out "how to rescue" this female and bring her back to her mate so they could "swim happily ever after."

Maybe I'll call the wild life patrol. Should I call the police? Then it came to me............Gina? The good Lord put her there........he'll help her to figure out how to get out. Mind your OWN business.

So......I looked down, Scooter totally puzzled why we were there so long. Gave me a tug on the leash and we went home.

The next morning we returned. Of course I headed right to the pool. Scooter and I walked around and ducks! :)

We strolled the path by the lake and what did I see but my 2 feathered friends happily swimming side by side!

I was overjoyed seeing them......Scooter really couldn't care less as he once again was fulfilling his morning "duty."

As we walked back home I thought about those mallards. How many times have we tried to interfere in someone's struggles? How many sleepless nights have we spent trying to figure out someone else's problems? How to get them out of it? Someone that we usually love?

I would like to believe that the male mallard finally exhausted himself and said to her" Listen! You got yourself into this mess! Figure out how to get out of it! I have got to take care of myself. I'm hungry! I'm going to the Mosquito Diner. Meet me there when you figure it out."

I would like to believe that the female sat down and said to herself "I have got to get myself out of this. I'm trapped inside this fence. I've got to figure it out how to get myself out." She did................. :)

Sometimes it so much easier to focus on another's problem than our own. Sometimes by focusing on others struggles it makes us not take a look at "our own" and what we can do to fix our OWN life and take care of our own problems that we need to solve.

The next time I even think about solving another's struggles that they can and should do on their own....I will think about what I can do to change a problem of my own.

Copyright © 2002 Gina Wehmann

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