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Questions From Readers
For HiZen
Part 6
(Crucial Questions About Life)

April 13, 2012


Dear HiZen,

I am 26 years old; professionally I am a doctor. Now the thing is I got married too early, this year only. Although I love the girl (my wife) somehow I am finding it difficult to manage, maybe because I am earning very little.

Also there is something that keeps on demoralizing me.
I don't know what it is.

Every day I give it a thought and have come to the conclusion that my desire to gain knowledge ceased after marriage. That might be the reason, as I wanted to study more but everything shattered. Even now I think of taking another course, in my area of interest, but lack of money pulls me back.

Kindly provide me the right way so that I can balance my life. There is no problem with my married life; everything with my wife is going well.


Dear Friend,

I admired your courage; getting married at a young age is a huge decision. There has been a lot of talk about people who get married; they often say a lot of things are put on hold once they do. Compromise and sacrifice is what they often call it. However, I don't think that you fall into that category.

There are a lot of things you want to accomplish with your life, thus, marriage should not be a roadblock, but a stepping-stone.

To ensure that happens, we need to clarify a lot of things, so, please consider the following questions as a guide.
  1. What are your plans regarding your medical profession?

  2. Can you describe in detail what you want your life to look like in 20 years? It must include things like marriage, children, profession, business etc.

  3. Can you describe the role your profession will play in how your life will look like in 20 years?

  4. Can you describe how the role of being married will play in what your life will look like in 20 years?

  5. Is your wife aware of your medical ambitions?

  6. Have you ever discussed your dreams and goals with your wife? What are her thoughts?

Once you are able to come up with the answers to these questions, it will become clear to you how your marriage and profession must complement each other for you to be happy on both ends.

There are many successful men who have attributed their success in business or career to how good their martial life is; how their wives have been a huge support to their ambitions.

Your task now is to find how being married and your profession complement each other. Answering the questions above can do this.

I understand the answers might not come quickly, but I assure you, once you are able to answer them, a lot of things will become clear to you and a sense of direction will be birthed within you.

Everything will become clear to you in due time.

Please be patient while searching for the answers, I am sure all will sort itself out.

Love always,


--- Copyright © 2012 HiZen-3 Ltd
This story is a series of letters written by Segun Cadmus, Manager, HiZen-3 Ltd, a company created to be the Ultimate guide in Culture Management at work and life. Please visit us at: for more information about what we do.

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